Saturday, September 18, 2010
Mortuary is about a family that moves to a random house so that the mom can become a funeral director. The house is ultra nasty, and seriously did this woman do any research on this? The teenage son (Jonathan) and young daughter (Jamie) know that shit is whack but the mom insists on staying.
Luckily enough for business, dead bodies are coming in left and right. But Mom Leslie is not so great at the embalming thing and it appears that some chemicals get mixed and bring the dead bodies to lifeeee. Leslie serves some assy soup and gets all freaky on everyone, forcing them to run for the hills. Meanwhile, there's also a creeper named Bobby Fowler running amok.
There's a weird mold growing all around the house which apparently turns you into some sort of blood-spouting semi-zombie. Or in the case of Leslie, you make gross soup and then spew blood. Either way. This movie wasn't horrible but it really just didn't have too much of a point. People keep disappearing and reappearing as sort-of zombies and it's just so confusing, that you just are like "whatever" after a while. Bummer.